Fortune Tellers

I sat near a teenage boy in church today and he had one of these little things that we used to play with as kids. I think we called them chinese fortune tellers. Put a big question mark in front of that- I really don’t remember. But you fold up a piece of paper so it makes a pyramid. And on the inside of it are 8 things you’ve written down. And you’re able to control it with your fingers so that, after a “random” amount of opening and closing it, you have 4 of the 8 things revealed. And these 4 things are statements about your future- who you’ll marry, what kind of house you’ll live in, whatever. It reminded me of a similar game we used to play on paper called HOUSE. In this game, you could usually find out who you were going to marry and what kind of dress you’d wear to the wedding, what job you’d have, how many kids you’d have, and what kind of house you were to live in. it was all very fun fantasizing about the way our lives would turn out. And even if you did end up with toothless Joe-Bob in a shack with 9 kids, it was just for fun.
As I watched this teenager this morning, I thought about fate. And I thought about all the life categories nobody ever anticipated.
How much trouble will you get into as a teenager?
What kinds of drugs will you experiment with?
What will you and your husband argue about the most?
How many friends will you lose to pointless deaths?
Who’s the one person you never thought you’d bury?
Will you even stay married?
Will you even have a job?

And of course the lighter topics…
Which activity will you enjoy the most? Couponing? Crafting? Or just sitting in peace and quiet for 5 minutes?
How many times will you be puked and pooped on?
How old will you be when you realize you have another person’s life in your hands? How long will you cry when you realize your child is the 1st person you’ve ever felt you’d give your life for?
Will you wear or carry your baby? Stroller or ergo? Sling or wrap?
Will you live in the city or in the suburbs? Will you be able to afford to live anywhere? Will you move back in with your parents?

Life.
Fate.
I know if I could go back, I probably wouldn’t tell my young teenage self too much. But I find it interesting the way we always plan for things to turn out. And sometimes they do go very much according to plan. But the fact is that life can’t be contained on a chinese fortune teller or a tweeny bopper invented paper game.
It’s bills and responsibilities. It’s choices that you never feel you’re old enough to make. It’s love and hate you only THOUGHT you had the capacity to feel when you were 17. It’s watching friends lose children and comforting others as they go through divorces, infidelity, and so much more. It’s having them comfort you when you’re going through your own unbearable struggles. It’s praying that you even have those friends when you need them. It’s losing and gaining valuable people and trying to determine what you want to do with this crazy thing called life you’ve been given.
I played the HOUSE game tonight as I was blogging (to the best of my ability, anyway. It really has been awhile ;) ) It told me I’d be married to my current husband, wear a fancy dress, and live in a shack with our 2 kids. Ironically, a lot of that seems to be accurate. But it’s just a game, so hopefully the shack house is negotiable.
Maybe if I could go back and do one thing, I’d take all those paper games I played with my girlfriends and I’d tear them up. And in their place, I’d write notes that said “Your life will be whatever you make of it” But that wouldn’t be as much fun, would it?