So... My blogs have been a little depressing lately. and I apologize. I'm in one of the many phases of life, and that phase happens to be filled with way-too-big changes and death. But I'm over it, so to speak. Well, I'm making the choice to blog about something else anyway ;) As I type these exact words, I'm not entirely sure what I'll blog about though. Maybe happy moments from our day... ??
Oooh, I've got a good one. I was drawing Abbie's bath tonight (do we still say that in 2010? DRAWING a bath?) and I looked over at her (she was supposed to be taking her pre-bath potty break). She had her head IN.THE.TOILET.!!! No, there was no swirley action going on. But she was trying to get a good look at something deep in there! So that made for a fun, albeit kinda gross, memory tonight.
I read her "the Three Little Pigs" for the 1st time today. It never occured to me that my 3 year old hadn't heard that classic story before. She enjoyed it.
As I sit here, I'm listening to Mark Wills. You probably don't even know who Mark Wills is. He hasn't even had that many hits. But there's something about his music that I could listen to for hours for some reason. So this is a happy time in my day. lol. It's like everyone else's glass of wine. Instead of drinking, I listen to Mark Wills.
Ad I'm looking forward to spending another whole day with my husband tomorrow (well most of it anyway). It's good for my soul.
That's all I got tonight. Nothing brainy or witty or adorable (as if that's much different from usual, right? ;)) Have a good night!
Melissa
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Fortune Tellers
I sat near a teenage boy in church today and he had one of these little things that we used to play with as kids. I think we called them chinese fortune tellers. Put a big question mark in front of that- I really don’t remember. But you fold up a piece of paper so it makes a pyramid. And on the inside of it are 8 things you’ve written down. And you’re able to control it with your fingers so that, after a “random” amount of opening and closing it, you have 4 of the 8 things revealed. And these 4 things are statements about your future- who you’ll marry, what kind of house you’ll live in, whatever. It reminded me of a similar game we used to play on paper called HOUSE. In this game, you could usually find out who you were going to marry and what kind of dress you’d wear to the wedding, what job you’d have, how many kids you’d have, and what kind of house you were to live in. it was all very fun fantasizing about the way our lives would turn out. And even if you did end up with toothless Joe-Bob in a shack with 9 kids, it was just for fun.
As I watched this teenager this morning, I thought about fate. And I thought about all the life categories nobody ever anticipated.
How much trouble will you get into as a teenager?
What kinds of drugs will you experiment with?
What will you and your husband argue about the most?
How many friends will you lose to pointless deaths?
Who’s the one person you never thought you’d bury?
Will you even stay married?
Will you even have a job?
And of course the lighter topics…
Which activity will you enjoy the most? Couponing? Crafting? Or just sitting in peace and quiet for 5 minutes?
How many times will you be puked and pooped on?
How old will you be when you realize you have another person’s life in your hands? How long will you cry when you realize your child is the 1st person you’ve ever felt you’d give your life for?
Will you wear or carry your baby? Stroller or ergo? Sling or wrap?
Will you live in the city or in the suburbs? Will you be able to afford to live anywhere? Will you move back in with your parents?
Life.
Fate.
I know if I could go back, I probably wouldn’t tell my young teenage self too much. But I find it interesting the way we always plan for things to turn out. And sometimes they do go very much according to plan. But the fact is that life can’t be contained on a chinese fortune teller or a tweeny bopper invented paper game.
It’s bills and responsibilities. It’s choices that you never feel you’re old enough to make. It’s love and hate you only THOUGHT you had the capacity to feel when you were 17. It’s watching friends lose children and comforting others as they go through divorces, infidelity, and so much more. It’s having them comfort you when you’re going through your own unbearable struggles. It’s praying that you even have those friends when you need them. It’s losing and gaining valuable people and trying to determine what you want to do with this crazy thing called life you’ve been given.
I played the HOUSE game tonight as I was blogging (to the best of my ability, anyway. It really has been awhile ;) ) It told me I’d be married to my current husband, wear a fancy dress, and live in a shack with our 2 kids. Ironically, a lot of that seems to be accurate. But it’s just a game, so hopefully the shack house is negotiable.
Maybe if I could go back and do one thing, I’d take all those paper games I played with my girlfriends and I’d tear them up. And in their place, I’d write notes that said “Your life will be whatever you make of it” But that wouldn’t be as much fun, would it?
As I watched this teenager this morning, I thought about fate. And I thought about all the life categories nobody ever anticipated.
How much trouble will you get into as a teenager?
What kinds of drugs will you experiment with?
What will you and your husband argue about the most?
How many friends will you lose to pointless deaths?
Who’s the one person you never thought you’d bury?
Will you even stay married?
Will you even have a job?
And of course the lighter topics…
Which activity will you enjoy the most? Couponing? Crafting? Or just sitting in peace and quiet for 5 minutes?
How many times will you be puked and pooped on?
How old will you be when you realize you have another person’s life in your hands? How long will you cry when you realize your child is the 1st person you’ve ever felt you’d give your life for?
Will you wear or carry your baby? Stroller or ergo? Sling or wrap?
Will you live in the city or in the suburbs? Will you be able to afford to live anywhere? Will you move back in with your parents?
Life.
Fate.
I know if I could go back, I probably wouldn’t tell my young teenage self too much. But I find it interesting the way we always plan for things to turn out. And sometimes they do go very much according to plan. But the fact is that life can’t be contained on a chinese fortune teller or a tweeny bopper invented paper game.
It’s bills and responsibilities. It’s choices that you never feel you’re old enough to make. It’s love and hate you only THOUGHT you had the capacity to feel when you were 17. It’s watching friends lose children and comforting others as they go through divorces, infidelity, and so much more. It’s having them comfort you when you’re going through your own unbearable struggles. It’s praying that you even have those friends when you need them. It’s losing and gaining valuable people and trying to determine what you want to do with this crazy thing called life you’ve been given.
I played the HOUSE game tonight as I was blogging (to the best of my ability, anyway. It really has been awhile ;) ) It told me I’d be married to my current husband, wear a fancy dress, and live in a shack with our 2 kids. Ironically, a lot of that seems to be accurate. But it’s just a game, so hopefully the shack house is negotiable.
Maybe if I could go back and do one thing, I’d take all those paper games I played with my girlfriends and I’d tear them up. And in their place, I’d write notes that said “Your life will be whatever you make of it” But that wouldn’t be as much fun, would it?
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
It is well.
a few days ago, I blogged about staying home. I told about my decision to withdraw from the one class that stands between me and my teaching career. and at the time, my mind was still so murky that I couldn't really even type the words out. I couldn't explain what I was doing and I why I was making such a huge shift in my life. Because I really wasn't sure of any of it yet.
But I've prayed a lot about it. And as God likes to do, I've found a peace and clarity that far exceeds my greatest expectations. What I prayed for was less stress, fear, and anxiety. What I've been getting is a new look on life. I've realized over the last few years that I often don't realize what "life" really is. Maybe I'm just now becoming a grown-up. lol. But it occurs to me that we talk about this thing called "life" and all of it's woes and worries. And then when we find ourselves smack dab in the middle of them, we feel like we're the only one who's ever experienced that.
I watched a friend get shot and die in front of my eyes. I was bullied for more than a year, until I finally moved out of that town, because people thought that I was in some way responsible for my friend's death. As soon as I moved, I lost both of my grandfathers. Then 2 close family friends. And when I had begun to recover, my brother died. Life isn't fair.
My husband and I fight over money and never seem to have enough. We've lived with my parents for 2 years now and still aren't ready to buy a house. I've been going to school for 6 years now. And instead of getting easier, it's all just getting harder. I've busted my rear end just for my family to meet end's meet and we're still nowhere close to where we want to be. Welcome to the real world.
My parents are much different than many of my friends' parents. My life has been much different. I've often felt cheated in some ways. That's life.
I often vent about these things because, althought I DON'T want a pity party, it really does feel like everyone else seems to have it so much easier. So much better. But God has shown me that I need to get over that and remember that life is not about what happens; it's about how you deal with it.
I told my husband tonight that the last couple of days had been much better for me. And as I explained it, the old hymn "It is well" came to mind. So I entitled this blog "It is well" because that's how I'm feeling right now. Yeah, I'm putting my career and education on hold. Yeah, it may seem stupid or silly or whatever else. But I am at peace with it. I am at more peace right now, just focusing on ME for a little while, than I have been in a very long time. And so I hopped over to Youtube to listen to that hymn while I blogged... just for a little more peaceful inspiration. And the link I clicked o blew my mind. Because as I sit here typing all this out, God brought the whole topic full circle with the video I watched.
Go to Youtube and search "It is well". Select the 3rd video down (the one that looks like a view of a rock in the ocean as the sun is setting. You'll understad what I'm talking about.
It is well. Right now, it is very well. God Bless!
Melissa
But I've prayed a lot about it. And as God likes to do, I've found a peace and clarity that far exceeds my greatest expectations. What I prayed for was less stress, fear, and anxiety. What I've been getting is a new look on life. I've realized over the last few years that I often don't realize what "life" really is. Maybe I'm just now becoming a grown-up. lol. But it occurs to me that we talk about this thing called "life" and all of it's woes and worries. And then when we find ourselves smack dab in the middle of them, we feel like we're the only one who's ever experienced that.
I watched a friend get shot and die in front of my eyes. I was bullied for more than a year, until I finally moved out of that town, because people thought that I was in some way responsible for my friend's death. As soon as I moved, I lost both of my grandfathers. Then 2 close family friends. And when I had begun to recover, my brother died. Life isn't fair.
My husband and I fight over money and never seem to have enough. We've lived with my parents for 2 years now and still aren't ready to buy a house. I've been going to school for 6 years now. And instead of getting easier, it's all just getting harder. I've busted my rear end just for my family to meet end's meet and we're still nowhere close to where we want to be. Welcome to the real world.
My parents are much different than many of my friends' parents. My life has been much different. I've often felt cheated in some ways. That's life.
I often vent about these things because, althought I DON'T want a pity party, it really does feel like everyone else seems to have it so much easier. So much better. But God has shown me that I need to get over that and remember that life is not about what happens; it's about how you deal with it.
I told my husband tonight that the last couple of days had been much better for me. And as I explained it, the old hymn "It is well" came to mind. So I entitled this blog "It is well" because that's how I'm feeling right now. Yeah, I'm putting my career and education on hold. Yeah, it may seem stupid or silly or whatever else. But I am at peace with it. I am at more peace right now, just focusing on ME for a little while, than I have been in a very long time. And so I hopped over to Youtube to listen to that hymn while I blogged... just for a little more peaceful inspiration. And the link I clicked o blew my mind. Because as I sit here typing all this out, God brought the whole topic full circle with the video I watched.
Go to Youtube and search "It is well". Select the 3rd video down (the one that looks like a view of a rock in the ocean as the sun is setting. You'll understad what I'm talking about.
It is well. Right now, it is very well. God Bless!
Melissa
Friday, October 8, 2010
I'm Staying Home
Wow. As scary as those words have been since I've contemplated them on and off for the last 2 years, they actually sound pretty sweet as I sit here and type them out. I'm. Staying. Home. I'm putting a lot of what I've worked for the last 5 years on hold. I'm withdrawing from the one that stands between me and a career in elementary school teaching. And I'm terrified. But I'm also happy about it.
I've spent the last 3 years wishing every day were a day where I got to stay home, take care of our house, and be with Abbie.
And there's a lot more to it than that. But it's taken me 2-3 days just to get this much on paper, so I'll blog more about it later. I'm staying home; that's the jist of it ;)
Melissa
I've spent the last 3 years wishing every day were a day where I got to stay home, take care of our house, and be with Abbie.
And there's a lot more to it than that. But it's taken me 2-3 days just to get this much on paper, so I'll blog more about it later. I'm staying home; that's the jist of it ;)
Melissa
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
My Happy Moments
My Wednesday seems to be wrapping up on a good, warm-fuzzy kinda note, so I thought I'd share some highlights of my day. Some of my happy moments today:
1. Getting to take a 2 HOUR nap!!! :o :o :o (granted, it was b/c I'd woken up at 4 am and was feeling awful... but still... a TWO HOUR nap! :D)
2. Listening to my crazy German Shephard as they tested the tornado sirens today. Mean, I know, but it is HILARIOUS to listen to him howl like a wolf in labor. Lol! I should have gotten it on video; it's a song like no other!
3. Spending time with my sweet girl when I picked her up from preschool.
4. Sneaking a peak at a house I found online and realizing that the neighborhood could NOT be more PERFECT!! (and that I wish we could put in an offer tomorrow b/c I don't think I'd even care what the inside looks like... I love the neighborhood THAT much!)
I'd say it was a pretty great day. And I'd love for you to share YOUR happy moments! ;)
God Bless!
Melissa
1. Getting to take a 2 HOUR nap!!! :o :o :o (granted, it was b/c I'd woken up at 4 am and was feeling awful... but still... a TWO HOUR nap! :D)
2. Listening to my crazy German Shephard as they tested the tornado sirens today. Mean, I know, but it is HILARIOUS to listen to him howl like a wolf in labor. Lol! I should have gotten it on video; it's a song like no other!
3. Spending time with my sweet girl when I picked her up from preschool.
4. Sneaking a peak at a house I found online and realizing that the neighborhood could NOT be more PERFECT!! (and that I wish we could put in an offer tomorrow b/c I don't think I'd even care what the inside looks like... I love the neighborhood THAT much!)
I'd say it was a pretty great day. And I'd love for you to share YOUR happy moments! ;)
God Bless!
Melissa
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